I know it's kind of hard to see in this picture, but look for the glowing eyes above the closet door.
Here it is moving across the ceiling, presumably because that will make it easier to jump on my head.
I would have gotten some better pictures, but that would have required actually standing in the room, and I did not want to challenge the authority of the spider. Any spider that is big enough that you can see its eyes glowing in a picture wins. It can have the room.
Here's the thing about cane spiders: They're too big to smash-I don't want to clean that up; they're freakin' fast, so it's hard to get close enough to smash them anyway; and they will jump at you, so even if you do get close enough to smash them, they will run at you and make you jump and scream like a little girl. Bug spray? I've seen one of these take almost half a can before it finally lay down in a soaking ball on the floor only to jump up a few minutes later, shake it off and start moving again. Granted, it was moving a little more slowly, but it was still moving. Besides, I don't really want to kill them, I just don't want them hanging out anywhere where they can jump on my head. So, when I see one, I move as far away from it as possible and then I just stare at it in horror for a while trying to think of some way to get rid of it and then I give up and start taking pictures or video of it. Because what else is there to do besides document the situation and then use the pictures to freak other people out?