I was recently trying to decide whether or not I am an optimist or a pessimist. I have not made much progress since my initial decision that I am a snarky optimist. I have, however, come to the conclusion that, if nothing else, I am at least more optimistic than my mother.
I will be traveling to DC and the surrounding area soon, and since my mother is about 2 hours outside of DC, I thought it might be fun if she came into DC to do some sightseeing with me since neither of us has ever been there. There were a lot of other logistical issues that needed ironing out, so we left that as a hanging possibility. A few hours later she called me back and when I asked if she wanted to do the sightseeing thing, she said, "I don't think so. [My husband] says it's too dangerous." I pointed out that we wouldn't be hanging out in dark alleys in the middle of the night. We would be visiting touristy places that hundreds (thousands, even!) of people visit daily without incident. No dice. End of discussion. (We'll call her husband "Bob"). Once Bob puts anything into my mother's head, that's the end of it. There is no reasoning her out of this belief, whatever it is. So, I didn't try. I know when I'm fighting a losing battle.
So, anyway, she will pick me up at the airport and drive me out to where she and Bob live, and I will spend a couple of days there. I have been pissed off about this for about a week now. I could, of course, tell her, "Well, I'll be in DC. If you'd like to come hang out with me, that would be great," but the outcome of that would be that I wouldn't get to see my mom. On the upside, I would avoid a couple of days living with Bob as well. If it wasn't my mother, if it was just some neurotic friend or distant relative, I would go that route, but it's my mom. It's hard to justify flying thousands of miles, across an ocean, cross-country to get within 150 miles of your mother and then not see her. She got pissed when I was in Nashville, over 500 miles away, last year and didn't make plans to see her. Plus, I am counting on being able to have enough time at the end of my trip to actually get in the sightseeing that I want. I do want to see where my mom lives; it's supposed to be a very nice area. I'm just pissed off that she won't come into DC (and likely never will) because Bob said it's too dangerous. Grrr. Stupid Bob.
My husband travels a lot and ends up in DC a lot, so that is part of the reason that I'm not too worried about missing out on stuff on this trip. Between his being out there all the time and the miles he accrues, I should be able to accompany him out there again. AND, I am pretty optimistic about the fact that I will be able to do it without being shot. Or mugged. Or at least not shot AND mugged.